Part 5 — Sitting in the Field of Flowers

While he stopped, he sat.
He sat out of exhaustion
out of that exhaustion that poured out of him,
from every part of him,
every cell of his body was pouring that sadness,
particularly of this exact memory.

He sat just for a little while,
and a little while longer he sat
with his memory in his two hands —
cradling it, nourishing it,
holding onto it as a precious piece of his luggage,
afraid to let it go,
terrified of keeping it,
and lost in between these two spaces.

He sat.

He sat and he hadn’t realized
that he sat in a field filled with flourishing wild flowers —
and how could he,
with all the suffering present in him
at the moment he sat.

He sat in the field of wild flourishing flowers,
cradling his memory gently sometimes
and abruptly other times
while his cries and sobbing ventured with the sound
of the bees, the birds, and the flourishing spring nature
after the snow had melted
and life started blossoming.

He sat unknowingly in a field
filled with life of interconnectedness and inter-existence,
with abundance,
with all that he had lost along the way,
what he has missed for so long,
what he thought he won’t ever experience
ever again in his journey.

He sat in that field, cradling his memory,
grabbing at its tide,
weeping at times
and contemplative at other times.

He began, tenderly, slowly, and gradually,
to realize where he was sitting.

As the pain became less,
he began to understand the depth
he has been sitting in
for a brief moment or two
or maybe three.

As the memory was mending,
as the tears that touched Mother Earth
have watered the soil around it sufficiently,
the pain in his heart became calmer,
the pain in his mind began to ease.

He realized that what he just experienced —
for the first moment since very long time,
since an eternity,
since he began to walk again —
was love.

Love for love.
Love for his memory,
for the person he was when he got hurt,
for the memory itself and its occurrence,
for the tears he cried,
for that version of him that experienced that memory,
for each cell in his body,
for each cell in the time and space of every body
that ever knew love —
he experienced love.

Love he experienced —
what he had thought that loss took away from him
and the valley of abundance.

Love — he experienced love
for his memory,
love for his pain,
love for his past,
love for what was present as it is,
with no need to change or amend.

Rejoiced by this realization,
rejoiced by love —
rejoiced by love he had not known where it came from.

Rejoiced by love,
by love,
by love —
he was rejoiced.

And soon after he looked at his belly button —
he looked there as if a crystal tied through a diamond shone through.

He looked at his belly button endlessly,
as if time itself & eternity itself —
time was not counting then,
time sat with him in that field,
time looked at him.

There was no longer time passing,
there was no longer anywhere to go
but that landing and the work
that guided his look into his belly button.

And as he looked,
as he looked for as long as he did,
it seemed like he looked into
his every cell of his being.

And as this season passed,
the butterflies migrated
and the geese and the birds were too.

He straightened his stiff neck,
he looked into the field
that had once again entered into spring,
to discover that all his life he had looked,
he had sought,
he had wandered and asked about and for love —
all the while,
every cell in his being was immersed in love.

---

Part 6 — The Realization of Love

And as this season passed,
the butterflies migrated
and the geese and the birds were too.

He straightened his stiff neck,
he looked into the field
that had once again entered into spring,
to discover that all his life he had looked,
he had sought,
he had wandered and asked about and for love —
all the while,
every cell in his being was immersed in love.

---

Enjoy my other reads:

Stop Blaming Your Parents: Turning Mindfulness into Self‑Responsibility. On this link.

Living in Peace: How to Find Inner Peace in this World? On this link.

How to Transform Self-Sabotage with Mindfulness and Love? On this link.

Emotional Identity and Pain: Who Are You Without the Struggle? On this link.

External Resources:

Zen & Engaged Buddhism:

Plum Village 

EIAB